Drabble Fics and OSfor Twilight 25 Challenge
by jennlen522
Summary: These are my entries.  They are not all beta'd.  This is a series of short drabble fics and one shots for the Twilight 25 Challenge.
1. Chapter 1The Problem with Rubbers

Author: 2b_twi_inspired

Twilight 25 Challenge

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

Prompt: 20. Vanish

Title: The Problem with Rubbers

His fingers, working magic inside of me, suddenly froze.

"Bella, what is that?" he shrieked.

"Um, W-What do _you_ think it is? He flicked it again.

"I think I know. I- I should go." Jake withdrew his fingers. "Yeah, look, um..Take care of yourself." I try not to laugh. He closes the door and I sprint upstairs. I have to know.

_**Edward-**_

**Solved the vanishing condom mystery. Not alone in my treasure hunt. **

**It didn't end well. Don't buy cheap-ass rubbers! **

_**Bella**_

_**Bella-**_

**LMAO, free tomorrow night? ;)**

_**Edward**_

_**Edward-**_

**See you then ;)**

_**Bella**_


	2. Chapter 2Sight Unseen

2b_twi_inspired

Twilight 25 Challenge

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No infringement here.

Prompt 23

Sight Unseen

The ocean laps around our toes. "Bella, let's try something." he whispers on my cheek. His hand is over my eyes. I do the same. It is sensory overload. Inhale, exhale. My hair lifts as the breeze flutters on my back. "What do you hear Edward?" My voice floats in the air between us. His warm breath now on my lips "I hear the sound of a thousand forevers with you." my breath hitches, I feel feathery kisses on my lips, chin and nose. The smiles we save for each other, unseen, reveal much more.


	3. Chapter 3 An Empty Place

The Twilight Twenty-Five

Prompt: 4  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Edward/Bella  
>Rating: M<p>

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd.

Title: An Empty Place

I desperately miss Edward. The hotel clerk delivers an envelope to my room. No one writes letters anymore. No one except my Edward.

_Dearest Bella,_

_Our bed is desolate without you. There is no joy with the waking sun. No more adventure at twilight. I did only three things today. I read, I wrote, and I missed you. _

_Please come home to me soon. My heart lay in waste until your return._

_Yours forever,_

_Edward_

I put the letter in my purse. Without hesitation, I pick up my luggage to leave. He is the other half of my whole world.


	4. Chapter 4 Nessie and Butterfly Kisses

The Twilight Twenty-Five

Prompt: 22-Girl with Butterfly  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Edward/Bella  
>Rating: Everyone<p>

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all Things Twilight. I do not.

Title: Nessie and Butterfly Kisses

Our beautiful baby girl Nessie is all pink ruffles, baby powder and butterfly kisses kind of sweet. Edward and I simply can't get enough of her smell and her chubby cheeks. When it was time to be discharged from the hospital, the nurses flitted around moving so quickly it's as if they were pushing a deadline to get us out the door. We were finally able to bring her home today. Edward sits on the sofa holding Nessie as she sleeps. I am putting away things from my hospital bag as I notice the pink list that Nurse Cope thrust into my hands just as we entered the car. She said it was some list or instructions or something. I decide I should sit down and give it a read before Nessie wakes for her feeding. Edward leaned in little to read over my shoulder.

**Warning: New Parents Should Be Aware of the Following Concerning Your New Baby**

The first week your baby will likely not sleep anywhere but your arms. It will have the sleeping habits of a vampire. You will feel like a zombie.

If your baby has colic then you should consider yourself stranded on a deserted island. No one will come within ten feet of you and that screaming child. No one will come for you. You must survive on your own instincts.

Baby poop doesn't stay in diapers, it is highly explosive and lingers in your nostrils for hours.

If the pacifier won't stay in your baby's mouth, consider using shoestrings to tie it in or surgical tape. Use your best judgment.

No amount of showering will make you feel clean once you have urine on your face or vomit in your hair.

Some children have an unatural aversion to car seats, baby cribs, strollers and play yards. If your child has an aversion to any of these, you will know instantly. You will need all the patience you can muster. Stay on your toes. They will test you and they are masters.

If M&M's go missing check the child's nose first. Remember to watch for colorful mucus.

Never, EVER, run out of band-aids or juice boxes. Your sanity is at stake.

Kids love suckers. Suckers end up in hair, carpet, on pets, and under furniture. Prepare accordingly.

Buggers are not your friends. Do not attempt to extract them without the suction. It may not end well.

Learn the fine art of tattoo removal: baby oil and patience.

At some point your child will use your favorite dress or shirt, which you are wearing, to wipe a runny nose. You will likely become a human snot rag. You must get used to it and get some stain guard.

Your child will inevitably get car sick on the very day that you overslept and are running late to work.

Kids have a sixth sense about stressed parents. They will either cry and whine all day or get the flu.

Potty training is a big thing. Praise the Pee and Reward the Poop. Always go look at it when they call you to come and see how good they made in the toilet. Bowel movements are fascinating to children. No one has discovered the true meaning of this anomaly.

Benadryl works wonders to set the stage for an early bedtime. Some days this is your only option for adult time. Use it wisely and remember protection. Adult time is how you ended up with this list in the first place.

All the mirrors in your home will eventually be covered in hand prints. Learn how to work around it. Trying to clean it every time they put a new one on the mirror is sheer brain damage. You need all the brain cells you can salvage. Trust us on this one.

FINAL REMINDER: Take your vitamins, get vaccinated, drink plenty of fluids and eat right. Raising kids is like a marathon except it never ends. This list should provide the guidance you need until your child reaches the age of five. After that, you are on your own.

Congratulations on your new baby. Thank you for choosing Forks General Hospital.

Edward and I were frozen, mouths agape as we finished reading the last few lines. Edward immediately handed over Nessie and got up from the couch. He was dialing someone on his phone.

"Edward, who are you calling?" he paced and ran his fingers through his hair.

"My dad. I have to find out what kind of return policy Forks Hospital has for newborns."

"Edward..." He left the room and I heard him begin speaking to Carlisle. A few minutes later he returned looking defeated.

"Well, what did he say?." I smirked because I would have loved to hear Carlisle's response.

He ran his hands through his hair again. "Well, bad news, the warranty expired the minute we left. No wonder that nurse was rushing us to get in the car. She practically dumped you out of the wheelchair. Bella, we are screwed."

"Oh Edward," I laughed a little and shook my head at his panic stricken face "she was ours from the minute we saw her on that ultrasound screen." He didn't respond, but came to sit next me on the sofa.

"So, what do we do now? I'm freaking out here. Help me Bella, I'll do anything. This is too much."

I gently placed Nessie in his arms again, stood from the sofa and looked into those beautiful, horrified eyes. "Well, there's only one thing you can do right now."

"What, anything. Tell me please."

"Well, Edward, I suggest you get your goggles and rubber gloves because you are on poop duty and she's holding one for you." I walked away hearing Edward's cursing and muttering about explosive diapers and projectile vomit.

"Yes, Yes, Edward, we are gonna be just fine." I said to myself as I headed off to take a shower.


	5. Chapter 5Alice and Wedding Cake

The Twilight Twenty-Five

Prompt: 25 Wedding Cake  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Edward/Bella  
>Rating: M<p>

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd.

Title: Alice and Wedding Cake

My phone buzzes alerting me to another text. Edward's phone rings.

The calls and texts have been non-stop. Alice, no doubt, has been alternating texts and phone calls. I am snuggling with Edward. My dress and his tuxedo are a crumpled mess on the floor.

Buzz Buzz.

Ring Ring Ring

"They are all going to be so mad that we eloped." His laughter shakes the bed. I grab our champagne-filled glasses, sit up, then hold one out to him for a toast.

"To Alice and wedding cake."

"To forever and wedding cake."

Buzz Buzz

Ring Ring Ring


	6. Chapter 6Lighthouses

The Twilight Twenty-Five

Prompt: 21  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Edward/Bella  
>Rating: K<p>

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd.

Title: Lighthouse

I have always loved lighthouses or maybe what they represent. The light calls out to those lost at sea and floundering. It is an obvious point of reference when your path is unknown.

I stand here feeling the salty spray soak my face and clothes. Will I be able to make her understand that her light brings life to my heart that no longer beats?

I know she feels her siren song to me.

Bella is my beacon. She is my point of reference. She is the first and last light in the darkness of the last one hundred years.


	7. Chapter 7 Worth Fighting For

The Twilight Twenty-Five

Prompt: 11  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Bella/Jacob  
>Rating: K<p>

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd. A letter to Jacob just before the wedding.

Title: Worth Fighting For

Jacob,

Your heart has left this place. You took it and ran without time for words.

I will always love both of you. It is not the same kind of love. I won't pretend that it is. We are not children anymore. There is no room for games in our lives.

I will continue searching for you. I will not stop asking your friends about you. If that pains you, I will not apologize.

Edward will be my husband and you are my best friend. This is not just about me anymore. It is about family. Come back Jacob.

Bella


	8. Chapter 8

The Twilight Twenty-Five

Prompt: 1 Wave from the Car  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Alice/Jasper  
>Rating: K<p>

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd.

Title: The Wave

I doubt Jasper will make it here this summer. The summer used to be what we lived for before we turned twenty-one, got jobs, and had to be adults.

He got engaged. The news of Jasper's engagement reminded me of the years I have spent lying to myself.

I sent one final e-mail. _I have always loved you. You know where to find me this summer._

_Beep _

_Beep_

I walk to the screen door. I smile. Tears slide down my cheek. Jasper is waving from that beat up VW bug he has driven for years. His heart did not forget.


	9. Chapter 9 Housewives

The Twilight Twenty-Five  
>www[dot]thetwilight25[dot]com<p>

Prompt: 2 Broken Wine Glass  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Bella/Rose/Alice  
>Rating: M<p>

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd. All errors are mine.

Title: Housewives

**9:42 p.m. Home of Jasper and Alice Whitlock **

Alice was finishing the last of the dinner dishes while Jasper sprawled on the couch in the living room. Her cell phone rang.

"Hello"

"Alice, I need your help with something."

"Rose, why are you whispering. What is it?"

"Shut up, just get out of that house and get over here!"

"Rose, I-"

"Alice, I have a dead guy in my bed. Get your gloves on and get over here, NOW!"

"Oh, Shit. I'll be right there."

She clicked off the call and yelled to Jasper that Rose had a female emergency. Alice opened the kitchen cabinet under the kitchen sink and grabbed her yellow cleaning gloves. _**Damn, Rose. Dead bodies. What the hell do I get myself into?**_

**0000000000**

9:45 p.m. Home of Edward and Bella Cullen

Edward was washing dishes. Bella was clearing the table and finishing her wine when her cell phone rang.

"Hey Rose." There was heavy breathing on the other end of the line.

"Bella, I need your help at my house now."

"What? Is everything okay? Are you-"

"Shut it. I have a dead guy in my bed." Bella lost the grip on her wine glass. Rose heard it crash to the floor. "Shit, Bella, could you be any more obvious? Bella...Bella"

"Um, yeah, I'm here Rose. Sorry. Okay, I will be there in a second. Just gotta..okay...bye." She clicked off the call and cleaned up the mess. Edward was already in the floor picking up the pieces and asking if Rose was okay. Bella waved him off, told him Rose had bad cramps and needed some girl time. He rolled his eyes and left the room to discard the broken glass. Bella grabbed the bottle of wine, took a drink from the bottle, then pulled her cleaning gloves from under the sink. It was about that time that Edward came in to find Bella wearing long yellow cleaning gloves and chugging the last of the Merlot.

"Everything okay there babe?" Bella shivered as the wine made its way down her throat. "Um, sure. It's good. Rose is just hell with PMS." He likely didn't buy it, but Bella didn't have time to argue. Obviously she had a dead body to bury.

"Okay, I'll be back in a bit."

**0000000000**

**9:58 p.m. Home of Rosalie Hale**

Alice was pacing in the living room muttering about dead bodies and yellow gloves when Bella came through the door. Rose sat on the couch, elbow deep in a bag of Doritos as she stared straight ahead.

"So, what the hell happened Rose? Did you kill him or what?" Bella asked and flopped down next to Rose.

"No, Bella" she snapped, "I did not kill him. He died while we were having sex. Now, unfortunately, we have to dispose of his body." Rose rolled her eyes, as if disposing of bodies was something she did every day.

Alice stopped pacing. "Why can't we just call the police? This is an accident, isn't it? They come and do a report, maybe a short investigation. This all blows over. Right?"

Rose looked up and met Alice's stare. There was something Rose had left out.

"Dammit, Rose. Spill it." Bella stood up. Alice rolled her eyes and went back to pacing.

Rose slouched down further on the couch. "Well, there may have been a little slip of something into his drink before we made it to the bedroom." Rose winced and waited for their lashing.

"What the hell Rose? What did you do that for?" Bella screamed and threw up her hands. Now she was pacing too.

"Oh God Rose, we are going to Hell for this. All three of us. What were you thinking? Alice whined and threw herself into one of the overstuffed chairs nearby.

"Well, he wasn't moving fast enough. He's a really nice guy. It's Emmett McCarty, from three houses down. He's super hot. I can't believe it. I just really, really wanted to get it on. So, I put a little X in his last glass of wine." The others groaned in unison. "That's why we can't really call the cops okay."

"Shit." Bella left the room and headed for the door. Rose grabbed her arm and spun her around.

"Where are you going?"

Bella jerked her arm free. "I'm going to get a shovel. You wanna bury this guy or sit around here and munch on Doritos all night? I've got to get home and have sex with my husband so the last memory he has of today is sex and not all the weird phone calls and shit. Now, I'm probably gonna have to do something "extra special" to make sure he doesn't remember." She looked at Alice and pointed. " And Alice, I suggest you do the same or Jasper will be calling his lawyer friend and snooping around with Edward when they figure out the new guy in the neighborhood is missing. So let's get this shit over with."

Bella led the way outside and around the corner of Rose's house to Ms. Cope's house next door. She was muttering the whole way. _**Damn dead bodies, ecstasy in wine glasses, digging graves and shit. My God. How do I get roped into this shit. I swear, I am putting my house up for sale tomorrow. **_

Ms. Cope is ninety years old, mean and has a dog that will eat anything. Her back yard should be the perfect place to bury a body. The yellow-glove-wearing-trio crept into Ms. Cope's backyard and began digging.

**000000000**

**11:00 p.m. Ms. Cope's backyard**

After the deed was done, they simply placed the shovels against the house and continued up the walkway leading to the sidewalk. They agreed to meet at Rose's house in the morning and went their separate ways.


	10. Chapter 10 The Ultimate Pick Up Line

The Twilight Twenty-Five  
>www[dot]thetwilight25[dot]com<p>

Prompt: 17 Lick  
>Pen Name: 2b_twi_inspired<br>Pairing/Main Character(s): Edward/Bella  
>Rating: M<p>

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: Not beta'd. All errors are mine.

O/S Title: The Ultimate Pick Up Line

"My lips are numb." I swayed a little in my seat. I can't really feel my fingers either.

"Maybe it is time we leave. What do you think, Bella?" Alice hiccuped. The waitress delivered my bottle of water and I opened it to take a drink.

"It's still kind of early." I frowned and glanced over at Alice.

"Well, there is this cute blonde guy that I have run into a couple of times tonight. I think I might want to kiss him, just a little." She winked.

"Well, when I can see well enough, point him out to me."

0000000 2 hours later00000

After several bottles of water and multiple trips to the bathroom, I am back from the edge of being sloshed and just happily buzzed.

"I'm making my move. He's the blonde at the bar, next to the guy with the messed up hair." I turned my attention to the bar and immediately noticed the guy with the messed up hair. I chuckled because even Alfalfa would have problems slicking that shit down. He's hot in a sort of carefree, "fuck you", kind of way.

"Okay, Alice, go for it. I'm going to have a smoke. I'll meet you in a few."

I walked out the door leading to the secure alley and lit my cigarette. The door opened and closed slowly next to me.

"Hey, you are the guy with the messed up hair?" His lips turned up to form a sideways grin. As he exhaled, I watched the smoke and his lips.

"You must be Alice's drunk friend."

"Nah, I'm not drunk. I can still feel my fingers." I waved them in his face.

"I'm Edward." He extends his hand.

"I'm Bella." I felt like I was in some fairytale where time stands still. I have had way too many tequila shots. That damn worm is starting to do crazy shit to my brain.

"Are you cold, do you want to go back inside? " He asked as he looked down and stepped on his cigarette. I let my eyes scan his body, and yes, I really wanted to lick him. I have to think of something quick.

"No. I'm okay. But, while you are here, you could help me with something." He looks at me with a confused smile. It's the kind of smile that says 'you're crazy, but go on.'

"See, I really need to test a theory I have." I winced and waited for his response.

"Okay, what's your theory?" He asked and ran his hand through his hair.

"Well, my brain says that I have had so much to drink that I can't feel my lips or my tongue. I say that I can." I pinched my tongue for emphasis. There's that hint of crazy again.

"And, how does this involve me exactly?" He asked as he crossed his arms.

"Well," I stepped a little closer, "I need to lick you to know if I still have my sense of taste, and I need to kiss you to make sure my lips still work." I said while offering him my most innocent smile. I felt his hands move slowly to my hips.

"Is there some kind of compensation for testing a drunk girls theory?" He said with a smirk.

"I am sure we can arrange something for your participation?" I responded with a smirk of my own.

"Okay, I'm in. Test away."

I pressed my body closer, his grip became tighter. He walked us over to the brick wall and slid down a little so I didn't have to stand on my tip-toes to reach him. I giggled at his efforts. When he stilled, I slowly placed a very light kiss to his chin, then two more along his jaw line to the left. Then, placed another kiss just below his ear. I used my tongue to lightly lick his jaw and the spot on his neck just under his chin. His eyes closed and his long lashes fluttered. My whole body hummed due to his response to my actions.

I pulled back for a moment, just to take in the look on his face. So sexy and serene. Our eyes met. "One more kiss." I said breathlessly. He nodded and moved a centimeter closer. "No, just stay still. Don't move." I focused on the dark pink of his lower lip. I need to taste him just once.

I placed my lips to his and breathed him in. Slowly, I let my tongue lightly caress his lower lip before I took it into my mouth gingerly tugged. We both moaned and my heart pounded in my chest.

"I can't. I can't do it like this." He whispered and forcefully took my face in his hands. Our lips and tongues crashed together. We kissed and licked and touched for what felt like hours, although I knew it was only minutes. We finally pulled away to catch our breath. Then he placed one gentle kiss on my lips and when he spoke, his voice was raspy and it made me want to hold him forever.

"So did you feel that?" He asked as his thumb lightly stroked my cheek.

"Yeah, maybe."

"Hmm. So your body wins, right?" He grinned and held me tighter.

"I would say so." I said as I sighed. Content.

"Well, I think I have decided what my compensation should be."

"And what do you think you deserve?" I tilted my head, wanting to hear more of this talk.

"I think I should get to test a theory of my own. One lick is never really enough." He tilted his forehead to mine.

It took me about half a second to think about it. I slipped my hand in his.

"Let's get out of here."


End file.
